Fun Maza

10:30 PM Posted by: Fun World 0 comments

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years.

He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.

He orders the guy out of the bed and ties him to a chair.

While tying the girl to the bed, he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

While he's in there, the husband whispers to his wife, "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict - look at his clothes!

He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck.

If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you.

Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates (upset) you. This guy is probably very dangerous.

If he gets angry, he'll kill us Be strong, honey. I love you."

To which the wife responds, "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear.

He told me he was gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any Vaseline.

I told him it was in the bathroom. So, Be strong, honey. "I love you, too".

Avoid using mobile while driving

issued in public interest



Wherever u go,our network follows……………….
Fun Book

Love Side Effects

3:37 AM Posted by: Fun World 0 comments

Side Effects of Love : Woman Speaks








Overtime -

If you are in a 9-5 job, and your man goes to office from 11am-11pm, you have to do Overtime. Meaning, you sleep late, get up early.. make food after you get home (even if you have had the toughest day in your life, first cook his food).


Food -

as much as he might be OK with you not knowing how to cook, he expects you will learn and make him some good food, if not as good as his moms (never will be), atleast something edible.


Food changes everything -

His mood, his feelings for you, his opinion of you. Believe me, EVERYTHING.


His friends/ your friends –

become 'Our Friends'


'Commitment' –

the word that scares him the most in the English dictionary.


The 2-faced man –

as much as he likes you to be 'western' in your clothing, he would Really prefer the traditional girl in you.


The Kid -

Men will always be boys. They don't grow up..EVER.


Appreciate his brilliance from time to time -

Men like to be appreciated for their ideas/ methods / conversations / advice.. Many of the brilliant conversations come after a few pegs are down.. (they may be repetitive, but, don't notice).. So, give it to him .


Tell him who you find Hot. He doesn't believe in the line, " Tu hi to mera sansar hai.. Aisa mera pyaar hai". He wants to know who his competition is!! (Even though there may be none).


Momma's boy –

At the end, Momma knows everything & you don't know anything.


'The Image" –

'I don't fall for ANY girl.. Girls fall for me" Poor dude, doesn't know when reality hits him, "Chappad phaad ke deta hai".


Most common gene -

"I am emotionally stable & mature" - Yeah, and I am the princess of Narnia.


Decision Maker –

He makes ALL the decisions in the house.. He decides which bank account the money comes out of – urs or mine?


Sports -

"Even if the streets are filled with riots, and there is an Arsenal – Chelsea match, the match is more important.. Don't disturb!" Even if they don't understand the sport, they have to watch it & make comments.


Friends -

Constant comparison as to whether they are 'Joey' or 'Chandler' or 'Ross', and couldn't care less about which of them you are..


The Acid test -

The best Friend.


Weekend –

"Life is a weekend" – it seems that they live from Sunday to Saturday, and thus you work Overtime (refer to point no. 1) during the week.. and you don't even get any extra credit for it.


Gossip Mongrels –

He wants all the gossip on your friends, but, wont accept that its gossip, coz, then, its called 'An update'.


$moking –

Time pass & a good reason to check out the women at office..


Women Effect -

The ex-s, the present, mom, sister, sister-in-law, cousin sister, all the women in his life- His biggest balancing act.


Work-life balance -

He is always the busy one at work.. If by any chance you are busy one day, god help you.


Flirting –

He thinks it's an art, and he knows it! Worst of all, he thinks that's how he got you.


Fights & Makeup –

Goes by the assumption that a kiss or a rose is all that you need to patch up after a fight.. I say, "Be a man",Lets talk.


TV Remote –

What is that?


Statements you hear often from your boyfriend -

"I have to take care of the family" – I am not family."Main hoon na" – That's the problem.

"Who is she talking to for SO long?" – Dude, its only been 10 minutes.

"Your phone is constantly engaged.. Who are you talking to?" (no matter what the reply, its not good enough)

"Make tea na… Get me biscuits… Maggiiiiiii…" – Get a cook.

"What are we doing for dinner tonight?" - Like I have a say in the matter.

"Uff.. How much Shopping will you do?" – even when the last time you went Shopping was 3 months back.




To the men reading this post -

We all know the reality of the situation, so, lets not be justfying anything said here.



To the women reading this post -

Have I left out any important points?




Disclaimer –

This is a collection of thoughts from women with boyfriends & not about anybody in particular. Any coincidence with my friends' behaviors with their girlfriends is purely coincidental.


Fun Book

Monk and Baby

9:01 PM Posted by: Fun World 0 comments


The Monk and The Baby


Once there was a monk who lived in a village. One day a young village girl became pregnant and was unmarried. She did not want to expose her boyfriend. Out of fear when her parents asked her who is responsible, she pointed her finger to that monk.

Her parents were infuriated. The next day, the whole village turned up to blame the him. "How could you?" "You dirty old man!" "You are a disgrace!" "Get out of our village, you hypocrite!" Some villagers even threaten the his life.

After listening to all the accusations, what he said was "Is that so?" and went back to meditate. Months went by; the young girl gave birth to a baby. The parents of the young girl were forced to find a father for the child.

The parents and the villagers went up to approach him saying "You are responsible for this baby; therefore you should bring up the baby!" Once again, he said "Is that so?" He took the young baby in his arms and went back.

By this time the he has lost his reputation but it did not trouble him. He took very good care for this baby and he manages to obtain milk and everything the child needed from his neighbors.

After a year, he young girl felt ashamed and guilty and wanted to see her baby. She finally told the real story to her parents. When all the villagers came to know the truth, they all felt ashamed of having wrong him.

So all of them gathered and went to the monk asking for forgiveness. Once again, after listening to them said "Is that so?" He handed the baby back to the young girl.

********

When you are right, one thousand angels swearing that you are wrong does not matter. But when you are wrong, ten thousand angels swearing that you are right will not make any difference.
Fun Book

 


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